Today, dd participated in a music competition where it was unlikely that she would win. One of only two 12-year-olds in the finals among a bunch of older teenagers, aged 15 and upwards, she was lucky to have made it this far. She played really well, though obviously with a few more rough edges than some of the more experienced (and stunningly talented) older performers. What made me glow was not that she was a finalist, nor that her performance was undoubtedly very good, but that she was very poised and comfortable while playing, fully aware that she wasn't one of the main contenders. And when the result came and the prize went, deservedly, to a really lovely older girl who dd knows a little, she was absolutely thrilled for her.
Just over a year ago, while she was still at school, I know I'd have been worried sick about her response to this kind of situation. That, faced with a competitive situation where she was at a disadvantage, she'd withdraw, feel inadequate and possibly resent the winner. Now, I don't know whether it's a sign of her growing maturity or of the freedom from the obsession with class-position, but I knew she'd be fine with a chance to play music she loves among people who would appreciate it and that she'd realize that it's not all about winning. Over the past few months, she's had a very easy ride - achieving awards in festivals and being told she's ever so clever. But above all of these, this is one of the moments when I've been most sure that home ed is working for us. DD suddenly seems so much more comfortable in herself and so much less brittle in her self-esteem. I couldn't be more proud of her.
No comments:
Post a Comment